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Couples Conflict Resolution

     At the heart of sustaining passion and awakening spirit in any relationship is joining two fundamental human needs. On the one hand is our need for closeness, security, predictability, safety, dependability, reliability, permanence. On the other hand, almost everyone has an equally strong need for breathing-room, adventure, novelty, mystery, risk, danger, interest in the unknown, the unexpected, and surprise. In other words, we each live with an emotional theme of either feeling that we are not being meaningfully met by others and life or a feeling of being imposed upon. Although the content varies, most disagreements at heart involve differences in some variation of these these two human needs. 

      Balance of these two needs (quality contact and breathing-room) gets lost when we emotionally merge or avoid merging in a way that is emotionally distancing. We often become so entwined in these patterns that we lose honest perspective on where another person’s emotions end and where ours begin, or who is responsible for what. In the honeymoon stage this works, but for mature intimacy it is a wet blanket buz killer.  It can lead to living life emotionally, mentally, or physically separate from the person you want to love most.

I am an expert at helping you resolve your deepest conflicts in a non blaming, heart-felt way.

I can help you find a way out of your conflict with clear direct guidance. 

    Your personal truth is never wrong even if your partner feels differently. Expressing your personal truth in a way that is clear, strong and open hearted takes refinement. I will help you discern and awaken this inner truth as an expression of your heart. I will help each of you secure the inner-strength needed to fully own your authentic personal truth and effectively communicate it in a way that works for you both.